excerpt
Bevan Longhorn sits in his room, reading his morning newspaper. He takes a sip of
coffee and decides he doesn’t feel like drinking it; usually, he has consumed two cups
by this time. The news of the day is not much different from the news of yesterday
and the day before; plenty of crime on the front pages, to show readers a world most
people don’t like to look at, although it’s before their eyes all the time. People try to
erase the real world and replace it with the magical world of television.
He wants to get up and go out; yet, he thinks, ‘What the hell do I want to go out
for this morning?’ It’s a morning heavy with clouds, heavy as his heart feels right
now. The first days of October have been cooler than September and people are
wearing light jackets and windbreakers. He needs to organize his paperwork and
prepare for the following morning’s work, yet he cannot concentrate on work at
the moment.
The hell with it, he thinks and his mind goes to the terrifying thought of
doing something very bad. What can he do to change the great myth called
regulation? What can he do to stop the misery that they unleash out there?
No, I amnot Matthew. I have a duty; I have to stay and perform what will be
my last task in the office regarding ‘The Circle’.
He gets up and puts on his jogging suit to go for a walk; there is a small
walkway along a park a few blocks away. When he reaches the park, he realizes
it’s crowded with people, even though it’s quite cool. He takes a few minutes to
look around; Yes, it’s chilly, yet a walk in the park will help him feel better, he
thinks. He looks around and feels more alive, yes, he feels better already. He
carries on; before him walks a young, big- breasted woman who moves the
cheeks of her ass quite enticingly and he decides to pay a bit more attention to
her. His eyes take hold of the woman’s buttocks as they move from one side to
the other; Bevan stares and then laughs at himself for looking at her in that way.
An older man, obviously frustrated about something, perhaps with the
movements of the young woman’s ass, walks with a cane in his hand, and since
he cannot keep up with the pace of the young woman’s ass, would love to stick
his cane where he cannot put his hand. As Bevan walks past him he hears the
man’s breathing, so fast and erratic. He turns and says to the older man, “Are you
okay?”
“Who the hell cares?” the man growls and keeps walking.
Perhaps this is the best answer one can expect from an old man frustrated
with himself who doesn’t know how to vent his frustration. Bevan keeps walking
and passes him without another word.
People have anxiety about their lives and anxiety about their future…
Hellenic Canadian Literature 